Give Your Girlfriend What She Wants for V-Day: A Screaming Orgasm

Whaddup, sex gods? Are you getting stoked for V-day? Ready to head into Pound Town with no return ticket? That’s right fellas, the day of love and [redacted] is nigh—get your girl what she actually wants this year: to cum for once in her god-damned life! That said, even those with the best of intentions don’t always get the timing right when things get down in the bedroom. If you’ve been having a little trouble getting her to “see God” lately, there's no better Valentine’s gift (for you and her) then one of Promescent’s experience-enhancing bundles—which happen to be up to 15% off right now—just in time for the sexiest holiday of the year. 

Maybe you’ll remember the brand’s prolific delay spray, (aka “the physical manifestation of thinking about your mom so you don’t cum”), which has dozens of enthusiastic five-star reviews. “I’ve tried similar products in the past and nothing works as well as this," said one reviewer. “Just enough to take the edge off and still enjoy everything!” With that in mind, Promescent is currently offering a special V-Day discount on the pleasure pack, which contains the aforementioned delay spray for you, and a warming arousal gel for her, as well as two other bundles to help set the mood and secure the big moment—the sensual satisfier pack and the rub and love pack.

If you’re the type of goober to give your valentine a “free massage coupon” (which—let’s be honest—is definitely not going to cut it), the least you can do is let her cash that in  with a sensual massage (before you get into the main event). The sensual satisfier and rub and love packs both come with added massage oil that is “the perfect consistency” that also “smells and tastes great,” according to one satisfied reviewer. Gentle reminder to all men to use more tongue. 

Now you have the tools to smash this February 14th and be the Adonis in the sack that you’ve always had the power to be (with just a teeny bit of help). Go forth and conquer, sex king; don’t sweat the small stuff this Valentine’s Day, you’ve got everything to delay that spray. 

Purchase Promescent Valentine’s Day bundles here. 

The Rec Room staff independently selected all of the stuff featured in this story. Want more reviews, recommendations, and red-hot deals?Sign up for our newsletter.